Do you wish you looked more like how you do in your dreams or how you did in your childhood visions of your full-grown self? Do you need someone to hear your thoughts and smile at them from time to time so that you know you’re a real boy? Boy, do I have something for you! Introducing, the relationship!
The relationship is the perfect accessory for the man that has everything!
Get yourself a dime piece to try
and forget the sound
of your mother’s disapproval,
or the way the world keeps forgetting to say good job when you do shit!
Score a bad bitch in attempts to disremember how bad you were to other bitches cause, “this ones different, man.”
Land a babe and if she isn’t, “different, man,” call her crazy to anyone that will listen and then swiftly find her replacement.
The relationship seems to be the perfect accessory for the man who has everything except for an understanding of his own intentions and emotions.
Relationships are the fastest sinking kind of ships when you board them for the wrong reasons.
If you don’t like boats, you probably shouldn’t be on one in the first place.
If you need validation, buy a mirror not a girl dinner
and if you’d like to hear laughter turn on any comedy special.
I am not your comedy special.
I am just strong person, strong current.
Sometimes dating feels like swimming
in a sea of subtle messages that I should be less,
like I could be harmony maybe but never lead
& I always push back on that
and then I’m falling
out of love which feels more like drowning then anything else I can think of.
I don’t mean to sound like an expert.
I am not one of those either
but I do fall in love like a professional,
like I’m getting paid for it
but often I’m the one paying for it
often it’s with boys that put me somewhere over……………..here.
like I’m the sweetest damn set decoration they ever did see.
I don’t need to be spotlight center stage but I sure am not
stuffed behind set,
sure am not prop and don’t have any idea how to act like one.
Guess the trouble is I go off script.
I forget my lines like:
“Yes sir” like “Whatever you want, baby” like “It’s no trouble”
Trouble is make too much noise.
He see me as bulldozer but I won’t bury my opinions
and I have a lot of them.
I love and learn in the currency of question.
I cry a queendom of tears for at least a week a month.
I feel and worry deeply.
I am beginning to understand the depths of which none of this is preferred.
Fortunately, I do not exist to be a preference,
to sit idol,
to decorate,
to accent.
If I am to be art,
I will be alive.
I will be loud
and I will be very much
here.
& 