convinced nobody wants either of us to be there. we’ve heard we’re articulate in front of an audience but now we get stage fright just walking up to a circle of people that love us because how could they love both of us? love me and all of my ugly? in a conversation, we’re figuringContinue reading “me and alllllllllll of my sad walk into the poetry event”
Category Archives: mental illness
I want to write a poem that makes my other poems shy.
Make them whisper to each other, ‘just who is that new girl?’ Turn their knowing eyes into awescapes like children eating their first bit of ____(your favorite childhood nostalgia treat goes here)____. I want to talk to our inner children the way we should’ve always been spoken to. our feelings given acres to run andContinue reading “I want to write a poem that makes my other poems shy.”
My least favorite thing about being an artist is continually convincing myself I am not one.
Imposter syndrome taunts in a voice that sounds exactly like mine. Anxiety hands it a microphone. ADHD plays 52 card pick up with my thoughts- hyperfixates on negativity. Invisible illness renders me too damn tired to fight back. Capitalism builds an entire amphitheater for the performance finds a way to fill the seats and profitContinue reading “My least favorite thing about being an artist is continually convincing myself I am not one.”
try
for receptiveintentionalwillinggivingresponsivegentletryto open upmaybecome upshortmaybelevel upstill wake upTry.
Mental illness is like your shitty college roommate.
It kind of does whatever the fuck it wants whenever the fuck it wants. It speaks as loudly as it wishes, whenever it wishes. It keeps going on and on well after your bed time & after you asked it politely to stop. It ate your cereal again. (Oops.) When was the last time itContinue reading “Mental illness is like your shitty college roommate.”
Today
I walk this world with flagrant fragility with grit, grace, & goodness. Today I sit on the floor and pretend it is comfortable to be sitting on the floor when really it’s just grounding, I mean really it feels like safety. Today I stop trying to collide the word comfort into the same spaces IContinue reading “Today”
Cramped in the corners of my crisising cranium, I cringe, I creak, I forget my own value again, forget my own name again. There are fifteen days of every month that I am not myself and therefore I am still myself but a part of me I prefer not to present, presently I am learningContinue reading
Here is every mental illness I’ve ever been diagnosed with, as a house.
because some people build homes out of their mental illnesses and I think I used to do that too. Homes are stable. Homes are steady. Homes are seemingly swell reasons not to go outside. This poem is a plea- Hey, no matter how comfortable your house is, please go outside. BIPOLAR is a house with soContinue reading “Here is every mental illness I’ve ever been diagnosed with, as a house.”
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