The worst part about not believing in god is that there is no one to barter with when my dads’ cancer drugs make him too weak to lift his arms he says to my mother, ‘don’t worry’ manages a smile attempting to be as luminous as his love ‘everyone dies of something,’ he says withContinue reading “Daddy Issues”
Category Archives: poetry
me and alllllllllll of my sad walk into the poetry event
convinced nobody wants either of us to be there. we’ve heard we’re articulate in front of an audience but now we get stage fright just walking up to a circle of people that love us because how could they love both of us? love me and all of my ugly? in a conversation, we’re figuringContinue reading “me and alllllllllll of my sad walk into the poetry event”
I want to write a poem that makes my other poems shy.
Make them whisper to each other, ‘just who is that new girl?’ Turn their knowing eyes into awescapes like children eating their first bit of ____(your favorite childhood nostalgia treat goes here)____. I want to talk to our inner children the way we should’ve always been spoken to. our feelings given acres to run andContinue reading “I want to write a poem that makes my other poems shy.”
Finite choice, after Sarah Kay
I chose two lines from Sarah Kay’s piece “Here and Now”
Instructions Home, after Jasmine Mans.
Break every shame clogged mirror before you begin (that way you have already begun). Turn left at the stoplight across from the small brick elementary school that proved to be reprieve from the kitchen table. Make a fire of the things you used to believe of yourself. 300 ft from where you ate pistachio iceContinue reading “Instructions Home, after Jasmine Mans.”
the first person in the bloodline to analyze their trauma does so after causing their weight in it.
for years I became the shape of my anguish. I wasn’t just hurt. I was the hurt. when you are the wound and the salt you would do anything to stop the hellfire you have become but not before you enact the pain, make it reverberate into someone else’s lap say heavy say here sayContinue reading “the first person in the bloodline to analyze their trauma does so after causing their weight in it.”
My least favorite thing about being an artist is continually convincing myself I am not one.
Imposter syndrome taunts in a voice that sounds exactly like mine. Anxiety hands it a microphone. ADHD plays 52 card pick up with my thoughts- hyperfixates on negativity. Invisible illness renders me too damn tired to fight back. Capitalism builds an entire amphitheater for the performance finds a way to fill the seats and profitContinue reading “My least favorite thing about being an artist is continually convincing myself I am not one.”
I am talking to my mom about a partner.
she stops me mid story to play a guessing game ‘Wait! Wait! I want to get them all right!‘Who has a kid on the way?’‘Oh! Oh! he’s the bartender, isn’t he?’‘Who lives in New York?’‘What’s her name?’ this is love:my motheradapting in real timeto a future she couldn’t have imagined for me. loveabundantetherealomnipotent I wasn’tContinue reading “I am talking to my mom about a partner.”
try
for receptiveintentionalwillinggivingresponsivegentletryto open upmaybecome upshortmaybelevel upstill wake upTry.
It is widely known that sunflowers bend towards the sun
it isn’t true but I wish it were, that when they can’t find it, they turn towards one another. As my friend bikes across the entire city so we can trade books and sit six feet apart, I’m sure humans do that exact thing. In a pandemic, there are still poetry readings and celebrations. InContinue reading “It is widely known that sunflowers bend towards the sun”
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