convinced nobody wants either of us to be there. we’ve heard we’re articulate in front of an audience but now we get stage fright just walking up to a circle of people that love us because how could they love both of us? love me and all of my ugly? in a conversation, we’re figuringContinue reading “me and alllllllllll of my sad walk into the poetry event”
Tag Archives: personal
chronic fatigue swansong 1/365
Exhaustion is the a) clingiest partner I have ever had. b) coat I am always wearing. c) dance I never stop doing. d) abusive relationship I can’t leave. Fatigue isn’t being tired. Unless, by being tired you mean it is your identity. It is my secret one. Everything you see of my ease is a)Continue reading “chronic fatigue swansong 1/365”
I want to write a poem that makes my other poems shy.
Make them whisper to each other, ‘just who is that new girl?’ Turn their knowing eyes into awescapes like children eating their first bit of ____(your favorite childhood nostalgia treat goes here)____. I want to talk to our inner children the way we should’ve always been spoken to. our feelings given acres to run andContinue reading “I want to write a poem that makes my other poems shy.”
how to survive the unsurvivable or what I do while waiting for the world to regain its color
scrollthrough the photosapp on my phone28,000 pictures and counting-delete duplicatesthe way I want to disappear myself(but I’m not a copy)stareat an image that appears inarguably beautifulor one in which I dorelish in howmy eyes see splendoreven through all the bullshiteven though somedays they can’t on those days death feels like a long awaited pause buttonaContinue reading “how to survive the unsurvivable or what I do while waiting for the world to regain its color”
Instructions Home, after Jasmine Mans.
Break every shame clogged mirror before you begin (that way you have already begun). Turn left at the stoplight across from the small brick elementary school that proved to be reprieve from the kitchen table. Make a fire of the things you used to believe of yourself. 300 ft from where you ate pistachio iceContinue reading “Instructions Home, after Jasmine Mans.”
the first person in the bloodline to analyze their trauma does so after causing their weight in it.
for years I became the shape of my anguish. I wasn’t just hurt. I was the hurt. when you are the wound and the salt you would do anything to stop the hellfire you have become but not before you enact the pain, make it reverberate into someone else’s lap say heavy say here sayContinue reading “the first person in the bloodline to analyze their trauma does so after causing their weight in it.”
An eclipse creates a shadow and wonders why it looks like that
I knew you were afraid of falling in love. I never said (but I wanted to say,) “don’t. don’t fall in love. stand up in it.” an eclipse reminds me that when you lose enough of something it becomes something else. I came to you entirely terrifying and at just the wrong enough time forContinue reading “An eclipse creates a shadow and wonders why it looks like that”
Polyamory: noun:
The philosophy or state of being in love or romantically involved with more than one person at the same time. Says the Oxford new American dictionary I say it is a series of questions Sometimes in the form of People Other times in their natural form: questions would you ever ask a parent to chooseContinue reading “Polyamory: noun:”
There is a certain kind of tired that only comes from arguing with your own body continuously
please open the jar don’t sit down yet just don’t call off again this week I am thirty-four and I have the hand strength of a fifty-three year old. I am thirty-four and age means nothing in the face of chronic illnesses. When my DNA was coded, my connective tissue was made too loose. NowContinue reading “There is a certain kind of tired that only comes from arguing with your own body continuously”
“Our tongues have a cadence.”
They move to whatever they move to and I don’t think we’ve taught them how to roll stack slide swirl push p u l l play so effortlessly off of and on top of around but never at expense of one another. their synchronicity teaches me to displace my worry of where things will goContinue reading ““Our tongues have a cadence.””
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