Exhaustion is the a) clingiest partner I have ever had. b) coat I am always wearing. c) dance I never stop doing. d) abusive relationship I can’t leave. Fatigue isn’t being tired. Unless, by being tired you mean it is your identity. It is my secret one. Everything you see of my ease is a)Continue reading “chronic fatigue swansong 1/365”
Tag Archives: words
how to survive the unsurvivable or what I do while waiting for the world to regain its color
scrollthrough the photosapp on my phone28,000 pictures and counting-delete duplicatesthe way I want to disappear myself(but I’m not a copy)stareat an image that appears inarguably beautifulor one in which I dorelish in howmy eyes see splendoreven through all the bullshiteven though somedays they can’t on those days death feels like a long awaited pause buttonaContinue reading “how to survive the unsurvivable or what I do while waiting for the world to regain its color”
The future is crowdsourced.
we pick each other ‘s brains like wildflowers. capitalism has never been tender with us so we are relentlessly soft with one another. This system leaves us for dead but we keep bringing each other nourishment gift-wrapped as laughter. we keep bringing each other Alive.
Just because you don’t want to hear it doesn’t make it fake news.
I speak a poem about my childhood trauma and you don’t like the culpability you say you have different opinions of my past I say I think you mispronounced, “this isn’t how I imagined my legacy” mispronounced, “I made you in my image who are you to be a visionary not just (my) vision?” Mom,Continue reading “Just because you don’t want to hear it doesn’t make it fake news.”
the first person in the bloodline to analyze their trauma does so after causing their weight in it.
for years I became the shape of my anguish. I wasn’t just hurt. I was the hurt. when you are the wound and the salt you would do anything to stop the hellfire you have become but not before you enact the pain, make it reverberate into someone else’s lap say heavy say here sayContinue reading “the first person in the bloodline to analyze their trauma does so after causing their weight in it.”
My least favorite thing about being an artist is continually convincing myself I am not one.
Imposter syndrome taunts in a voice that sounds exactly like mine. Anxiety hands it a microphone. ADHD plays 52 card pick up with my thoughts- hyperfixates on negativity. Invisible illness renders me too damn tired to fight back. Capitalism builds an entire amphitheater for the performance finds a way to fill the seats and profitContinue reading “My least favorite thing about being an artist is continually convincing myself I am not one.”
An eclipse creates a shadow and wonders why it looks like that
I knew you were afraid of falling in love. I never said (but I wanted to say,) “don’t. don’t fall in love. stand up in it.” an eclipse reminds me that when you lose enough of something it becomes something else. I came to you entirely terrifying and at just the wrong enough time forContinue reading “An eclipse creates a shadow and wonders why it looks like that”
it’s been a year of years.
time, head down concentrating- lacing their shoes like a fever-dream I trip over sometimes, I look at the people I love and I see cheekbones and eyelashes. smiles brave and worn. In recent weeks I smile at myself in the mirror every single time I step out of the shower. (it’s liberating to unhold aContinue reading “it’s been a year of years.”
Polyamory: noun:
The philosophy or state of being in love or romantically involved with more than one person at the same time. Says the Oxford new American dictionary I say it is a series of questions Sometimes in the form of People Other times in their natural form: questions would you ever ask a parent to chooseContinue reading “Polyamory: noun:”
It is widely known that sunflowers bend towards the sun
it isn’t true but I wish it were, that when they can’t find it, they turn towards one another. As my friend bikes across the entire city so we can trade books and sit six feet apart, I’m sure humans do that exact thing. In a pandemic, there are still poetry readings and celebrations. InContinue reading “It is widely known that sunflowers bend towards the sun”
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